Friend: This bird plane shit is insane.
Me: Um HELLO. I JUST emailed Nick, saying, "See, THIS is why I'm afraid to fly. A BIRD brought down a fucking plane?"
Friend: UGHH. I've always hated birds.
Me: Noooo, I love my babies! I keep thinking about the poor bird that landed in the engine. Yikes.
Friend: Pet birds are different. I used to really want a blue jay as a pet.
Me: Blue jays are assholes. Really mean, supposedly.
Friend: Yeah, figures. I always love the assholes.