To think this once seemed innocent.
So I’m standing on the corner of Houston and 1st Avenue waiting to cross when one of those big tourist buses runs the red light. The little neon white guy is telling us that it’s okay to traverse the crosswalk, but we can’t because this bus driver thought, “Oh why not?” and decided to go for it. Traffic is backed up and the bus ass is hanging out into the street blocking the pedestrians' way. Everyone else is shaking their heads in disdain and making a big show of walking around it but I'm not in a big hurry so I stay on the curb listening to my iPod, waiting for it to move on. Just as it lurches forward I go to push my sunglasses back up the bridge of my nose but accidentally use my middle finger, so it looks like I'm surreptitiously flipping them off (and it really was an accident; when I flip bird, I do it with purpose). I quickly exchange it for my pointer finger but the damage is already done. As the bus glides past, the driver actually opens that little door and shouts, “Fuck you!” This may be the closest a tourist bus has ever come to the real New York.